SadEyes35

All of the things I have been through and deal with today do not make me any less worthy of friendship love and respect….

In life, it is imperative that people have friends in their life…
Ever had a friend that even with an unspoken look it is understood that things in your life or theirs have gotten crazy? Friends that don't carry your baggage or burden, are not a crutch …yet they just provide company in life's journey and when there are stumbling blocks that you fall over, they remind you that you have the strength to pull yourself up? The friend that doesn't stop you from falling, but at times, ease the pain of impact, they don't help you up… but you know they will help you HELP YOURSELF not to drowned if you get in too deep. Someone who is willing to help you become more adept at entertaining yourself… to not be so slow to do things alone when they can't be with you?
The one that will go back and forth with you after dinner out and sometimes go as far as to wrestle you for the check at a resturaunt because somehow they just KNOW you paid for the last meal you had out together and friendships are give and take...

When someone can look you in the eye and say I love you and you know that they really truly have the deepest love for you… that is the greatest gift of friendship, and I thank God that I have been blessed with that. Being able to talk about anything and everything whether it is the rhythm of the rain on the roof of the car, or the reason for the tears welling up in your eyes as you talk about the trials life holds for you right now. Having arms open wide to draw you in, a shoulder to cry on, someone to laugh with… Phone calls just to say I love you, I'm thinking about you, I admire you, I'm glad we're friends. When more than a day passes and you haven't heard the others voice, there is a void and you reach out to make that connection… speaking of connections…I read somewhere that spaces between your fingers were created so that another's could fill them in…Holding onto someone's hand…holding onto someone's heart…

Thank God for the blessings of true friendship, the kind where you don't do things that could break the connection, you do things to make the relationships stronger, more solid and make them last forever. The friends that are there for the 1AM calls of despair when the razor calls my name and I can't see anything through the tears that burn my eyes as they soak my face. The ones that are there to laugh while sitting in the car, hearing a train and not knowing where the heck it is at until it passes right in front of you. The people I can talk to and finish their sentences so much of the time that it seems as if we think with the same brain. "You took the words right out of my mouth… That's unsanitary ya know!"

I have had my plate overflowing lately with too much energy being put forth to people and things that are negative. I believe strongly that if the relationship that you have with your friends is worth anything I believe that true friends are not willing to throw those friendships away. Most of the negative things that happen are done and cause by people who are not really friends in the first place, The people that are not your real friends have no idea what loyalty means… they are people who outright blatantly disrespect your relationship with others and in turn disrespect YOU. I have run across my share of people who say they love me and in much of what they say there are hurtful digs pushing buttons and then surprise at a reaction of distance, people whose actions speak volumes of how much they DON'T have respect for another's wants, needs, other relationships or for their feelings and yet believe in their minds that somehow another should have open arms for them and want to "connect" with them on any level other than to just be civil with them in order to lessen the drama of constant confrontations. A semi-famous quote from Dr. Phil is "You teach people how to treat you" So I think that the bottom line is I have been handing out the wrong lesson plans to some people lately while others are teaching me that they want to be treated just as I do and it is the connections with THOSE people that deepen and become stronger as time goes on…

If it were not for the true friendships, the deep connections we are sometimes blessed with, all those in our lives that bring negativity would smother all that is good and take the life from us. Does that mean I would allow someone to send me to the bring of death… I have before, years ago… and just a few nights ago I felt I was taken there again except this time I did not react by hurting my body, did not even call anyone to ease the pain… I started writing about true friendships and started looking at those that are in my life who are willing to let my happiness shine instead of trying to bury me in jealousy, hurt and anger triggered by words and actions already known to bring these feelings to the surface and I made it through.

I am not one for New Year's Resolutions and I didn't make any life changing decisions as the new year arrived… but as I began writing this blog and am now wrapping it up… I DID decide something….
I decided that I will continue to nurture the friendships that are filled with loyalty, respect, and love… and continue to nurture MYSELF with respect and love…

In closing, I wonder…
What kind of friend are you? Are you someone who is loyal, trustworthy, and respectful, are you supportive of your friends hopes, dreams and decisions, do you listen and hear them when they open their hearts and try not to hurt they heart they are sharing with you?
What kind of friends do you have in your life?

THANK YOU to those that are my TRUE friends, highs and lows, thick and thin and EVERYTHING in between! I love you and that comes straight from the heart!!

Posted in Writing and Poetry